Marriage means to merge – the two become one flesh. It’s a mystery that begins with a blood covenant. It’s the reason why God gave women a hymen, so the covenant could be ratified before the children were conceived.

Some people marry, but never merge. Independence, fear, mistrust, selfishness, and unforgiveness become impregnable walls of division – a force field of indiscretion.

A mergerless marriage leaves Adam (husband and wife) “alone,” longing and yearning for connection, feeling incomplete, abandoned and isolated.

When the mystery of matrimony is nullified, marriage is reduced to a mere partnership; agreements exchanged, duties assigned, and territory surveyed.

Yet the unyielding wonder of one love, one body, and one spirit longs for expression. This passion for intimacy and need for connection woos us into the vortex of sacrifice where we finally experience life. The climax of marriage is experienced when we lay down our rights and take up our cross.

This is the Genesis dream, which lies in the heart of the Father: “A man shall leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife. The two shall become one flesh.”

When married couples lay down their lives for one another and merge in the mystery of supernatural assimilation, the contrast between marriage and cohabiting will speak for itself.

The gay marriage debate also evaporates in the shadow of the manifestation of the miracle in which a man and his wife flow seamlessly into one. This constitutes the cord of three strands that remains unbroken.

The two are three because the miracle of marriage is in the third cord of love, which is God Himself.