Many years ago the then Vice President of our ministry handed me a book by Ruth Heflin titled GLORY, Experiencing the Atmosphere of Heaven. It left me ruined for the desire not only to experience His glory, but also as a worship leader to see those I lead in worship experience this same glory. The main principle of the book was “praise ‘til the spirit of worship comes, worship ‘til His presence comes and then wait in His presence until He brings us into the glory.” Over these 30+ years, I have hit many plateaus of the first 3 levels, always growing in His grace to allow me hundreds of personal as well as corporate times of coming into His presence and often delivering others into that Presence.
Recently, I was once again “ruined” when I read a book by Dutch Sheets titled How to Enjoy the Pleasure of His Company. Ruined, ruined, ruined! Did I say ruined? I mean it friends…Father has done something in my heart that is so life changing I can hardly find words in the English language to describe what has happened. I’m going to attempt to share with you here some of what I have discovered and though I know that there is so much more to come, I want to share with you what I can share today.
I have many acquaintances. I have few friends. Let me explain. I know lots and lots of people the majority of which are acquaintances…they know me only from a distance. I have few friends. I can count those people on one hand. They are people who know me well. While they don’t know everything about me, they see and know some of my warts, my shortcomings and even some of the dark things that still remain in my heart…BUT THEY STILL LOVE ME, and more importantly, I know I can trust them with my life. On this earth my very best friend is my hubby! But I have One that is my companion. He knows EVERYTHING about me inside and out…He sees all and knows all. This One is my Abba Father. He has become my best companion and I am absolutely ruined to know that I am HIS companion. He loves just to spend time with me and He recently told me, “I need your undivided attention.”
“Yes, Daddy, Your undivided attention. What does that look like from Your heart?”
He said, “I want you to come to Me with no other agenda…not any petitions, not any questions, not any Scriptures, not any music. Come with nothing but yourself and your heart.”
I have to be very honest. My first attempts were awful. My soul was screaming. There were many things demanding my attention and other voices crying out to be heard but somehow I knew that His whispers were demanding my attention, my undivided attention! There were also my own versions of what it meant for Him to have my undivided attention, like discussing a question in Scripture, or praying for another’s prayer requests or praying for my family, or the ministry vision…and the list goes on endlessly. While those are worthy things, they do not fit in His definition of ‘undivided attention.’
For many years, Rog and I have prayed together. But Father revealed to me that if I was praying with Rog, Daddy didn’t have my undivided attention! So one of the first things I had to do is find my own place alone with Him. He calls it the secret place (Ps 91:1). I chose my back deck. No music (ugh! That is really hard for me!), no Bible, no journal, no book to read, and certainly not any phones or computer gadgets. Those things are good and important but they would be for at a different time. I must learn to come to Him and to Him alone and proskyneo (GK for to kiss towards Him) with my undivided attention. John 4:23-24. In the natural, when I kiss Rog, my sweetheart, with a REAL kiss…not just a peck…I proskyneo! Rog has my undivided attention at that moment. Coming to this place of undivided attention with Abba, I must get ‘ in His face‘ and proskyneo! I must give Him my undivided attention, be silent and still (Ps 46:10) and be more than His friend, I must be His companion sitting in His lap and kissing towards His face. When I do that, I have HIS undivided attention and we then connect heart to heart. This is the place where I believe His glory comes from. I can praise ‘til the spirit of worship comes, I can worship ‘til His presence comes, but can I get face to face with Him and give Him my undivided attention so that His glory enraptures me and I am ruined! Many may say, Gerri, you are splitting hairs. Think that if you will, but remember I have been ruined by all this. The man with experience is not at the mercy of the man with an argument! I am captured by the thought of His glory and I MUST have it. I simply must. It draws on my spirit like a magnet. I yearn for it because there is nothing else like it. It calls me in the night hours and sings to me in the daylight. His glory is better than any time I have spent in His presence…ever! I cannot live without it.
Current events tell us that gross darkness is covering the face of the earth . Ron McGatlin writes “we have entered into what is probably the most volatile season of change since the great flood of Noah’s time…great, thick darkness is covering the earth. Deceiving spirit and other demonic activity is greatly increased across the world. BUT it is under this thick darkness that the intervening move of God is pouring the pure, holy love of God which will flow directly into the hearts and lives of God’s humble people.” What are we to do? The answer to that question is found in Ps. 91, “He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High shall remain stable and fixed under the shadow of the Almighty Whose power no foe can withstand.”
If you want to remain safe in the events unfolding all around the earth, find your own personal secret place and go meet the Father there. Give Him you undivided attention…kiss towards His face and let His heart entwine with your heart. Get into the GLORY. Trust me. IT WILL RUIN YOU!